I have come to understand that decision making is one of the hardest tasks to accomplish especially between two immutable things. You can not help but think the pathway you forsook for the one you are taking may be the right one after all. This thought in itself is very troubling and a sense to run the forsaken path becomes heavy on your mind. Imagine a friend of mine announced that she was not interested in marrying her fiancé just 2 days to the introduction. In her own words “I am still in love with my former boyfriend and I am happy to call off this relationship (referring to the abolished relationship). Could this be true or the typical dilemma that faces decision making?
In making decisions like this, experience is always sought by the actor, in order to come to a favorable decision. I experienced a scenario today that makes me question the use of experience in every day decision. I sent a mail through the NIPOST Speed Mail popularly called EMS and was promised delivery after 3 working days but NIPOST partners TNT failed to deliver it on the said date so on going to NIPOST to complain, I was told not to worry that it would be delivered the day I made the complain. Oh was I furious, but I kept my cool knowing NIPOST has breached the contract and the mail was time-sensitive. I went home eagerly anticipating a delivery report on the TNT site but was I disappointed. I waited impatiently the next day to come, only to check the site in my office and discovered the mail was still not been delivered 2 days after the scheduled date. Oh was I furious with myself and thinking of the next step of action to take.
I was faced with two alternatives; either to go to NIPOST to complain bitterly or let the event sort themselves out. Experience has taught me that the latter can never work out so I decided to try the former but immediately arrested by the Spirit of God who gently told me to take the latter. As you know, I ignored the Spirit of God and went with experience. Boy was I angry with myself after complaining bitterly and nothing was solved; I sat down in the Post office for 40 minutes of work time just staring at the air looking for a strategy to adopt then the message I heard in church started filtering in.
Going back to the Garden of Eden where two trees were located in the midst; the tree of good and evil and the tree of life. God specifically warns us not to take the tree of good and evil which is known as Experience in today’s parlance but to eat of other trees especially the tree of life which is regarded as the Holy Spirit. Jesus actually attested the Holy Spirit as the best teacher so why do we always regard experience as the best teacher. Why do we always believe that what happened to Mr. A is a best indication of the situation? Why don’t we trust in the Holy Spirit? Why do we ignore Him in the face of emotional turmoil? I took out time to understand this myself and I came with the following conclusion;
1)     Conditioning: We have been conditioned to believe in what we see rather than what we don’t see in essence we are driven by our sensory organ and we immediately doubt that which does not appear physically. This is what we are entitled to conquer as a Christian in order to win the battle against the flesh. But how feasible is this; this can only take place when we cooperate with God and spend time with him. The more we spend with God, the more we are able to be perceptive to what we don’t see. Â
2)Â Â Â Â Â Multitude of Counselors: Â the scripture that supports multitude of counsellorship has been misplaced and wrongly interpreted. A lady before accepting a guy would ask advice from various counselors on the pros and cons of making such decision and the popular advice is always opted for by the lady. I find this very misleading because God is not a democrat nor is he interested in the popular advice. There is a specific advice for specific persons and this can only be found by the manufacture of that person and that is God. It is when God has spoken to you, that a confirmation is communicated to the individual through various medium.
3)     Can’t Hear God: This is a common issue amongst Christians who find it difficult to perceive when God is communicating to them. Understanding what God is saying to you per time comes with practice; it is an ever-learning experience because he speaks to you through His Spirit who communicates to you in the best way possible. There is no clear definition of how this is done, but a “knowing†on the inside of a person that this is God speaking. When God speaks it is easier to go for the alternative because one is not always use to his voice. Some best indications are that God can never tell you to do what you are familiar with especially in decision making because He wants you to grow.
4)Â Â Â Â Â Easier Route: It is human to favor the easier route to solving any task but this always compound issue. A deep rooted person stand firm in all weather condition. Take for example my decision to go complain bitterly is easier than just sitting down and doing nothing (though this is based on personality and temperament). My temperament permits me to go for the action, this is an easier route but mostly a wrong approach when you are in God; one is expected to be patient (a golden virtue) which is difficult to attain in such given situation.
5)     Emotions speak louder: In discerning God and our emotion, we find the emotion speaking louder than God’s voice for a novice. The decision my friend took to canceling the wedding may be right or wrong but her response simply shows the emotion speaking louder than God. She may eventually get it right but only God can judge.
Experience may seem good but the Holy Spirit is the best teacher………….
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19 comments
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November 7, 2006 at 8:01 pm (UTC 1)
first of all im glad to see you are familiar with the terms forward and reverse engineering (only dipo knows what i mean)
My response is that it has been proven that experience is the best teacher for example
The most wealthy and influential nigerians and people in the world as a whole do not even have university or bachelor degrees but learned as they went along i.e used expereince. Some examples of these include in nigeria alone include Alhaji/Sheik Mai Deribe, Dangote/Dantata(sold building materials), Prince Samuel Adedoyin, Chief Iwyuanyanwu, Igbenedion, Hayford Alile etc most of these people did not even attend secondary school.
Others who attended university ended up venturing into other areas that they did not study for example shehu shagari was an educator but ended up in a political capacity as president, Hayford Alile is an apostle/ theologian but is actively involved in the financial and business sector.
When a PHD or professor postulates a theory, the theory is supposed to be tried and tested and the results are what we learn from ie if the theory works in reality or not. The theory may not be right today but may end up being right in the future, so everybodies idea/input is actually right. This is why honorary PHD’s are given to individuals who have excelled or contributed to the advancement of a particular field or area of study for example Brig-Gen Buba Marwa has be awarded a honorary PHD in public administration and has contibuted and achieved in Lagos State what a lagos indegine such as Asiwaju Bola Tinubu has not till date.
November 8, 2006 at 9:57 am (UTC 1)
Hi Dipo
In my opinion I dont believe experience is the best teacher….It may be so when one is young and thinks one knows all…if you make a mistake you have time (hopefully) to correct it.
when you are older and cannot afford make silly and costly mistakes that that could effect others around you especially if you are responsible for them….ie family or business.
A wise person would seek advise…as k those that have walk your road before, been where you are going.
As for me I have too much to do…so to save time, productivity and effectiveness i ask those that I trust and have shown them self worthy in there particular field before i venture forth.
I believe that is wisdom.
November 8, 2006 at 10:34 am (UTC 1)
@ J
Wow, we differ in this topic but like you have enumerated. Experience may be a cool teacher but it’s not the best.
Trust me, I know that for sure.
@ Angela
Wow, I have really missed ur comments.
Where have u been?
Anyway, if you ask those who have tow the line before they would tell you from a limited perspective but if you learn to listen to the Holy Spirit, you would find out that those that you consider expert may not be experts after all.
November 8, 2006 at 11:50 am (UTC 1)
…Well nice to have you back as well.
Yes I agree following the advise of other can be limited,but it is still a better starting point.
I agree too about learning to listening to the H.S. but i do believe God too talks to us through people and situation…Every advise should be weigh and balanced before the word of God.
so I would conclude they work hand in hand.
A person that finds it hard to learn from others will have a difficulty learning from God…talk less hearing.
A person with a “teachable spirit” will find it easier to hear from God.
November 8, 2006 at 2:18 pm (UTC 1)
Wow Angela,
I agree with your opinion but how can you differentiate H.S. from man speaking especially in ways you are not familiar with for example;
A lady is confused over whether to marry her fiance or not based on the fact they have the same genotype of AS.
Anybody she meets for advice would always be in favour of declining the wedding based on experience but God may be saying something else. How do you resolve it, my dear Angela?
November 8, 2006 at 4:33 pm (UTC 1)
Dipo You know what….It’s not an easy one you hit me with.
But if we are dealing babes in Christ it maybe difficult. If you have a solid walk with the Lord and you dont just read about faith but actually have it and live it.
The bible talk about seeking good council, that is advice. In the scenario your talking about here….It will be good advice for her and her partner to-be, learn all the nessary implication of there union, but the lady herself should be hearing from God and this is where her level of faith or maturity in Christ comes in…
That for me would be the only way to get her particular revelation about what God would want for her.
There no hard or fast rule that is, what’s revelation is all about.
November 8, 2006 at 10:42 pm (UTC 1)
Myself, Dipo and Angela are all right! a combination of life experiences, advice from elders/specialist/other people, guidance from God, education etc can all be combined to be the best teaching solution or can all help you when making lifes decisions such as marriage, career/education choices. in essence a think tank with a combinations of inputs to produce the best output/outcome.
Change management which is a relatively new category of management, should also be considered for example IT /Telecom is the biggest booming industry in nigeria now about 10-15 years ago it was banking and finance, however Telecom had boomed in the past during the days of ITT in the 70′s during the Muritala Mohammed era so you will notice that occupations are like genes and can become dominant or recessive.
There are many kinds of change ie gradual or sudden/radical
a coup-de-tat or is an example of radical/sudden change. This kind of change you are not aware of it coming ie it take you by surprise
gradual change example: you are a student and you know you will graduate in 4 years from now and will need to start gradually looking for a job. This kind of change you are aware of it coming
Alot of times radical change is the best and only option out of a problem for example ojukwu wanted to cut off igbo land from nigeria because he felt igbo were being marginalized, but so did Gowon , he felt the igbo had everything ie president (zik), chief of army staff (Ironsi)etc and all other tribes were marginalized.
similarly in america George Washington a british general planned a coup against the british army because he felt he and a lot of american born british soldiers were being discriminated against be cause they were not looked upon as being original british. They would not get as good appointments or prompt promotion, so he formed an alliance with the natural enemies of the the british ie the french, spanish, and dutch and they succeded in driving the british back home and so USA was formed! So radicals are actually some of the best people!
November 9, 2006 at 12:15 pm (UTC 1)
@ J
You are a man ( youngman) of alot of information, but boy you do loose me after a while.
A beg my brother how all the tin u done talk have to do with hearing from God.
A beg no vex.
November 9, 2006 at 12:31 pm (UTC 1)
Ok….My bro’ J
I have read your posting over and over again…and yes!!! I finally seeeeeee.
I do agree with what you said about radical change…that will only happen with a person that has a mind of there own and ready to step out!
A visionary sees things with a different eye and and perspective ( visionaries are sensitive to another voice) in this case I would like to say the
H.S.
November 9, 2006 at 4:29 pm (UTC 1)
Wow , I am seeing a diplomatic Angela; wow!
This can not be…………………..
November 9, 2006 at 4:36 pm (UTC 1)
Hmm…. Diplomatic??
I would like to believe I say it like it is….
November 10, 2006 at 6:45 am (UTC 1)
Angela what i mean is that i feel that when looking for a future partner, one should also consider alternate strategy and be willing to change some of our marriage contract requirements such as the person must be slim with a lot of money, with this and with that. In short you will not find a 100% perfect fit , but you will find a close match to expantiate there is nobody who upon becoming a president/MDfor the first time who had been one before. Theperson may have related expereince from a more junior role such as director , genereal manager, Chief of army staff etc but not a 100% match with former MD/president experience
or will you tell me that Gowon who took over the reigns of govt at the tender age of about 32 as a Lt Col had prior experience as a head of state, or does atiku have VP experience before now ? Angela if you are old how come you not in a position to be able to make your own decisons about such things as marrige cause Gowon seemed to know how to make decsions at the age of 32
Even Obj said “i am waiting to hear from God” before running for 2nd term but still look at what transpired to date! Murtala Mohammed never said he was waiting to hear from God at anytime in his administration neither did Buhari but i can guarantee you that those guys were the best for nigeria in terms of discipline/values, prosperity, progress everything would have been organized in nigeria by now if they were still there! pls dont use Gods name in vain if you have your own requirements they look for the best fit , in human resources this is called “the most suitably qualified canditate”
November 10, 2006 at 11:15 am (UTC 1)
Where do I start @ J lol
In the case of a life partner…Anyone can pick who ever they want to marry, that is why you are an adult.
Adults make INFORMED decision, that is why it is good to get advice (the finally decision is yours) You suffer the consequence or enjoy the benefits.
It is abit hard for me to say whether Gowan/buhari rule where better or the country still had money then so we did not notice or feel the leadership was corrupt in any way.
Obj is no angel but I think he has done the best he could with what his got.
What we are look for is who is best suited to take Nigeria to the next level.
I believe we are in the mess we are in now as a country due to BAD PAST LEADERSHIP (Obj inclusive).
God still specks and He is the best adviser to have in Life.
November 10, 2006 at 4:37 pm (UTC 1)
Well, I’m not gonna get into any of the heated debates y’all have fired up in here. ‘cos for one I’m blanking knackered and my brain is in safe mode.
I’m just gonna say that experience isn’t necessarily the teacher ‘cos you don’t have enough lifetime to experience everything on your own or to make all the mistakes yourself.
The sanest point that J has made though is that a pot-pourri of all that’s been mentioned is a good vantage point. The only reason why I won’t quarrel with his saying that it’s the best is because, we don’t always hear from God, either because we don’t know how, or we’re too wrapped up in out own stuff to realise that he’s speaking to us, or sometimes like Dipo said in the post, we hear but decide to do things our own way anyway.
I once saw a book, the title of which is somethig like, Don’t talk to me now Lord, I’m praying. That just about sums up the point I was making in the paragraph above.
If we have the maturity of spirit to live with total reliance on the Holy Spirit, which I must confess I don’t have…yet. lol. But I’m working towards, then, we have found that most perfect of teachers that has long eluded the human race.
I rest my case. Hey Race and Case rhyme. I’m getting good at this rhyming business, isn’t that pure sweetness.
November 10, 2006 at 7:48 pm (UTC 1)
True
November 13, 2006 at 7:32 am (UTC 1)
Thank you luminus & life of a stranger once again “get wisdom(education), but with wisdom get understanding (see which education applies and which does not ie experience)
There is something called the learning curve in education:
the more you learn something the better it stays in your memory the better you get and after awhile you get tired of learning it in economics this is called utility (after awhile you get sick of drinking much coke/awoof starts running belle, but initially its very thirst quenching)
This learning curve is the reason why alot of people do not follow in the footstep of the parents occupation because they know the in and out of the work already and decide to go and learn something else.
Another point im getting at is that some women need to change their methodology of seeking men , if you see a nice guy why not go and at least say hello, instead of posing! also using back up stategy is a good ides , always have a 1st , 2nd, 3rd etc choice incase the first few choices are taken. this back up stategy is useful in life in general ie always ask yourself “what if something happens, what will i use as a backup” for example on this website there are a lot of jobs imagine if shell is your best and only choice and for some reason you were not able to get in, that would leave you depressed but if your back up plan also included to try virtaully all oil companies then your chances of getting an oil company job would be higher.
November 15, 2006 at 11:29 am (UTC 1)
Hi Dipo,
Well I must this is a nice piece, and just like others belief, experience is a good teacher but not the best. I will take an example from the IT world. Most IT support engineers or companies have “a knowlegde base” of problems their customers usually experience and their resolutions,but most of the times these “resolutions” won’t just work for another customer that is experiencing the same problem as noted in the “knowlegde base”. One have to find another work around for the problem. Experience is GOOD but not the BEST teacher, and I want to agree with the writer that the BEST teacher is the Holy Spirit. I can testify!!
Cheers!!
November 20, 2006 at 2:08 am (UTC 1)
Olu are you drinking beer why the cheers?
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